Philosophy and English Combined Under New Pataphysics Course

By Frederick “Quickie” Mercurium After much confusion and discord between Philosophy and English faculty, both departments now have a new course that covers common ground: pataphysics. “I have to admit, I was just joking around when I suggested that,” said Professor Lazlo Gorman, a guest professor from Sacred Heart University, “I didn’t think you stag-smartasses … Continue reading Philosophy and English Combined Under New Pataphysics Course

Titus Andronicus on Ice Review

By Frederick “Quickie” Mercurium Before Fairfield University’s theatre crew could present the Shakespeare tragedy, Titus Andronicus, I was given access to another collaborative work with Webster Bank Arena. This work was being funded by the English department in an effort to be faithful and family friendly to the local community. This was, of course, reviewed … Continue reading Titus Andronicus on Ice Review

Mysterious Bandit Replaces All Whiteboard Markers with Sharpies

By Nathan Schmidt Our first warning sign was when Professor Joely Kale tried to erase the whiteboard after her 8:00 AM session of English 11. The eraser succeeded only in slightly smudging her analysis of the human condition in popular culture. All evidence shows that the nameless troublemaker known only as the Poacher has preyed … Continue reading Mysterious Bandit Replaces All Whiteboard Markers with Sharpies

English Class Derailed When Students Can’t Spell “Debauchery”

By Nathan Schmidt This week, an upper-level English class descended into chaos after the professor discovered that none of her students could spell the word “debauchery.” The incident arose after a group activity involving writing on the whiteboard, where freshman Joel Hanesby wrote the word “dabosherie” in a description of the Greek god Dionysus. The … Continue reading English Class Derailed When Students Can’t Spell “Debauchery”

English Professor Conflicted Over Graffiti That Follows MLA Format 

By Mike Wishart The Department of Public Safety is searching for clues as to who is responsible for the vandalism of an English professor’s car in the parking lot behind Donnarumma Hall. But while DPS continues its manhunt for the perpetrator, the victim of the crime is not so sure that the vandal deserves any … Continue reading English Professor Conflicted Over Graffiti That Follows MLA Format