By Alexis Shepard It was a tough outing at the latest COSO Academy meeting. The budgets had been released and everyone was together to voice their frustration at the collective lack of money given out to clubs. Insults and threats were hurled and the worried staff of COSO tried to explain that FUSA had barely … Continue reading Finance Clubs Blow COSO Funding on Cocaine
Category: FUSA
FUSA Senate Authorizes the Purge
By Akaky Akakievich I am writing again with some grave news, comrades. The FUSA Senate has issued a chilling statement that reminds me of home in all of the wrong ways. With a unanimous vote, the Senate agreed to enact an annual purge on all of the students at Fairfield University. On Thursday, October 31st, … Continue reading FUSA Senate Authorizes the Purge
FUSA Senate Denies the Existence of Friday
By the Guy in the Blue Scarf Wednesday’s FUSA Senate meeting ended with a surprising result as they voted down a proposal to recognize the calendar day of Friday. In the unanimous vote, FUSA Senators said that “Since our decisions are the most important and our say is absolute we have the power to decide … Continue reading FUSA Senate Denies the Existence of Friday
FUSA Senate Debates Removing the Carcass of Stag from LLBCC
By Nathan Schmidt Controversy has once again embroiled the FUSA Senate as its members debate whether to remove the full stag carcass from the Barone Campus Center. The hollowed-out and taxidermized stag, which is located in the BCC lower level, has provoked strong reactions both for and against its removal. Supporters say that the stag’s … Continue reading FUSA Senate Debates Removing the Carcass of Stag from LLBCC
FUSA Senators Flip Over Tables, Declare Anarchy
By Nathan Schmidt Last week, chaos descended on Fairfield University when the last FUSA senate meeting of the semester ended in literal anarchy. The assembled senators, who had come together one more time to determine the starting conditions of the next semester, quickly realized that this was their one chance to truly cut loose. And … Continue reading FUSA Senators Flip Over Tables, Declare Anarchy
COSO Accidentally Re-Enacts Bank Run Scene From “It’s a Wonderful Life”
By Nathan Schmidt Improv theater and real financial hardship mixed this week when the Council of Student Organizations staged a live, unscripted and unintentional re-enactment of a famous bank run scene in cinema. The classic movie It’s a Wonderful Life, released in 1946, includes a moment during which everyone in town rushes to withdraw their … Continue reading COSO Accidentally Re-Enacts Bank Run Scene From “It’s a Wonderful Life”
FUSA Senate Passes Resolution to Recognize Summer Vacation
By Nathan Schmidt In a jubilant but confusing turn of events, this week’s FUSA senate meeting resulted in the senators passing a resolution to recognize and support Fairfield University’s summer vacation. The three-and-a-half months between spring and fall semesters each summer, which have always divided apart academic years by Fairfield tradition, now officially have the … Continue reading FUSA Senate Passes Resolution to Recognize Summer Vacation
FUSA Shuts Down Government
By Nathan Schmidt This week, a disastrous series of budget talks in the FUSA senate led to a complete shutdown of the student government. The shutdown came after a major partisan conflict between the Committee on Academic Support & Retention and the Committee on Diversity & Inclusion over the next budget plan. Following numerous failed … Continue reading FUSA Shuts Down Government
FUSA Senate Passes Resolution to Purchase Sound Block for Gavel
By Nathan Schmidt This morning, the Fairfield University Student Association announced in a campus-wide email that its senate has passed a resolution to purchase a sound block for their single gavel. The resolution, which came after several meetings’ worth of debates and procedures, will enable the FUSA speaker to strike the ceremonial wooden mallet against … Continue reading FUSA Senate Passes Resolution to Purchase Sound Block for Gavel
FUSA Elections Hacked by Russians
By Akaky Akakievich The game was rigged from the start. There was always talk of collusion, double counting, and unauthorized poster campaigns, but here at Stagnation we are here to produce the truth that it was in fact the Russians who hacked the FUSA election. The exact reason as to why the Russians wanted to … Continue reading FUSA Elections Hacked by Russians
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