Investigation Finds Tuition Goes Entirely to Lawn Maintenance

By Nathan Schmidt In a scandalous turn of events, an investigative report discovered that Fairfield University’s entire revenue from tuition during the 2017-18 academic year has been directed towards lawn care on campus. The reporter, who asked to remain anonymous but may be a particularly bored member of the Stagnation team, found the quietly unreleased … Continue reading Investigation Finds Tuition Goes Entirely to Lawn Maintenance