Pizzagate Redux: DPS Operation Busts Levee for Operating as Brothel

By Pete Peterson

It turns out pizza wasn’t the only thing people were paying for at the Levee.  On Saturday night, DPS and FBI raided the pizza place around 12:23am and took seven people into custody for operating a brothel.  Only a few major injuries were reported.

Those taken into custody include two owners/operators, the piano man, and four sophomore students.  The bust comes after a ten month long undercover operation, carried out by DPS and FBI agents. Reports claim that the owner of The Levee has been soliciting prostitutes out of his restaurant, targeting mostly freshman kids stupid enough to get a prostitute from a pizza restaurant.  Head of DPS, Aubrey Graham, told us that the restaurant/escort shop had very secret language and rules to gain access to the dark side of the business. This, he explains, is why it took the elite agents so long to bust the criminal enterprise.

Stagnation interviewed one of the students that were present at the time of the raid and asked them if they knew about the brothel.  “Oh yeah,” said freshman Michelangelo Hunt, “the first weekend I was here I just walked up to the counter and asked if this was the place where you get laid for twenty five bucks.” He continued: “The guy said ‘Yeah’, and then just told me to give him the money and go into the kitchen. I even got a couple pieces of pizza out of the deal too.”  

According to our sources, the infamous piano man was the mastermind behind the illegal operation.  The man known to transition to Michael Jackson right after Sheck Wes was said to be the Michael Corleone of the Levee apparently made thousands of dollars every night of the weekend. Through a practice of attracting employees by telling them he’ll play their song request if they do him a favor, he amassed a large collection of wealth and power. Prosecutors plan to push for the maximum sentence against him.

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